Simple and common, we all know this type of rut in the brain, a channel that our thought processes seems to lodge in and not move from without effort.
What do you do about thoughts and memories that jump into your head that you know need to stop because of their emotional, mental or spiritual harmfulness? Can you banish memories you never want to recall again; the ones you wish you could erase from your memory because of harrowing sadness, because of soul-invading disappointment or because they reverse the healing of a broken heart?
Yes. You can change trains in the hard stuff, too. It takes prayer and practice: learning to refocus on positive, appropriate, worthy subjects. As actors do in a fine film or musicians do in a symphony, you must rehearse, rehearse and rehearse some more to perform well, and you must have a qualified director or conductor (God!) to pull it all together. Also, you need to be aware of what you're thinking, when, where and why. More on that later.
Recalling pain, sadness, fear and other negatively-geared memories can put a person in a tailspin. I used to find myself on "auto pilot" to navigate my day while my brain took the train to the places I did not want to go. A friend told me I had the power to retrain my brain, and the power comes from God, through prayer and purposeful changes in my thinking habits. Elizabeth over at Warrior Wives calls these purposeful changes "mental gymnastics." I've found God to be an expert coach in mental gymnastics. Go for the gold!
Paul, in 2 Timothy:1-7 says this,
"For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control."
Fear of our own thoughts does not come from God, nor does the "repeat button" we put on those thoughts come from God, for as above, He gave us a spirit of power and love and self-control. Self-control! But I CAN'T control those thoughts. My mind just goes ...
The practice/rehearsal part we need comes in exerting self-control. We teach our children to have self-control. We expect it from them at greater levels as they grow older, yet as adults, we find it strangely satisfying to share our pain again and again -- to explain it to others for validation (others often have the same issues), and to sit in our own misery, remembering and replaying and hurting all over again. Totally lacking in self-control.
If you happen to be in a situation at present that grieves you, that hurts, that has broken your heart, the spirit of fear can feel like a constant companion. Many emotions swirl inside, but the idea that thoughts will invade unexpectedly can bring an overwhelming sense of fear that we keep, like a watchman at his post, ready to alarm us at the first inkling of a distressing memory. Don't let the train run away with you. Pray for peace of your mind, for new focus on positive things, and for God to be the watchman, turning you in the right direction to overcome fear and the habit of remembering.
In Philippians 4:8, you have a sort of list of acceptable thinking: "Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."
Easier said than done? At first, yes. Remember ... practice! Now, it's time to know WHAT will trigger thoughts and memories to surface. Paying attention to the core of the memory -- why it aches so much (loss, rejection, dealing with illness, betrayal, disappointment, etc.) and giving that core an airing to God -- whisper it, think it, cry it, yell it, scream it, call it out from the deepest part of your soul. Pour out your heart, and do so every time you feel the lowest lows and believe He will both help and heal. You will begin to feel His peace, to see more light than usual, to find new direction in areas of your life. The low points will begin to gain altitude, and you will feel God making a difference in your outlook and in your thought patterns.
Notice WHEN you remember these things. Discover WHERE they tend to unveil themselves and WHY they seem to come at you when and where they do. Do they happen when you find yourself alone for a while? In a certain environment that triggers the emotions or memories? In the company of specific people or at a time of day? Pray about these triggers, for the ability to overcome them, and to make the effort to return them to normalcy as much as possible. When you know you will face one of the stimuli for your unwanted thoughts, toss a prayer to God and find ways to prepare yourself, mentally, for discomfort or struggle within you. Lean hard on God. Talk to Him as you enter the difficult arena, and as you move through it. Focus!
So. You want to change trains on these thoughts of yours. Pray. Know your thoughts -- all the details, and the what/where/when/why of them. Pray some more, and breathe a prayer whenever a wave hits, and give thanks when you find you have overcome a bad moment with more ease. Let God be the conductor in this faith experiment.
You are not alone.
Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life. Proverbs 4:23
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